From Employee to Partner

partner

The title of this post has been sitting in my drafts for over a year. When I created the title, I was referring to our partnership with God in our lives. Since creating this title, I have definitely grown from being God’s employee to God’s partner in life. So what is the difference? Next, I will offer my perspective…

An employee is defined as “a person employed for wages or salary, especially at a nonexecutive level.” There are “good” employees and “bad” employees. Good employees uphold their duties they have been assigned, at times go above and beyond to complete their tasks, are generally reliable, and are a good representation of the company. Employees also earn wages or a salary for their work and may do some things above their duties, but not too much, as they will expect compensation for their time invested after a while. A bad employee shows up to work (most of the time) and may or may not fulfill their full work duties day to day. A bad employee is not reliable, but consistent in their behavior. They may be reprimanded, but never quite do enough to be fired, as they know their wages or salary are attached to their role. A bad employee often brings down the morale of the company and often complain as they are performing the duties they consented to when first being hired. As an employer, it’s quite painful to pay a bad employee.

In your relationship with God, which type of employee are you, a bad employee or a good employee? Do you dutiful perform the tasks given to you? (Dutiful meaning you are obedient, but lack a real desire or enthusiasm to do the work you are doing.) Do you go above and beyond, only if at some point compensation is attached to your efforts? Are you reliable? Or do you begrudgingly show up to work everyday? Do you complain about every task given to you? Do you only perform your duties if God compensates you for your work? Do you continue to hold on to your job only because you idolize your paycheck? Are you a good representation of your employer?

In contrast, let’s explore the difference between an employee and a partner. A partner is a leader within a company and adds value to the company’s mission and vision. Here are the characteristics of a partner (some information taken from an article by journalist Katia Lavoie):

  • Partners have stronger ties and a deeper commitment.
  • Partners have better decision-making skills.
  • When an employer hires a partner, they are able to secure higher financing because that person serves as good “collateral”.
  • Partners share the wealth with their employer.
  • Partners hold themselves, the employer, and other employees more accountable for their work because of their personal and emotional investment in the company.

I believe God desires to find more partners with Him on the Earth. God desires a deeper commitment to His plan for our lives and desires our personal and emotional investment into His desires not our own. Although God values employees, good and bad, God knows who He can truly rely on to utilize their Faith, sacrifice their time, invest their time and money with or without compensation, while still displaying the same enthusiasm in helping the company to grow. Additionally, I believe God delights in compensating (blessing) partners in ways they couldn’t even imagine because of their obedience and sacrifices.

I believe over the course of our Christian walk, God desires a transition from employee to partner. God desires a deeper commitment to His will for our lives day by day. I believe God is looking for people to bless abundantly and miraculously for their obedience and sacrifices. I believe God has a storehouse of blessings for partners.

Are you comfortable being an employee or are you ready to live uncomfortably to become a partner? Employees enjoy a comfort partners do not. Employees gain some type of compensation for every tasks performed, whereas partners often sacrifice long hours without (immediate) pay. Employees perform their duties and then clock out, whereas partners are always “working” and making decisions to benefit the employer no matter the time of day. Both have a purpose, yet are different in their positions and compensation. Not all employees are eligible to become partners, not because God’s lack of desire, but because of some people’s lack of willingness to sacrifice the time and commitment required to reap the true benefits of a partnership. Partners often do not see immediate compensation but understand “in due season we shall reap if we faint not.” Galatians 6:9

The seasons are shifting, are you ready to transition from employee to partner?

Dr. TC

What a week…

The past week has been a week of trauma. An experience that drained me physically, broke me emotionally, and confused me spiritually. I’m stronger physically, but still emotionally fragile. Two hours before the trauma hit, I was under a heavy spiritual anointing on an appearance on a podcast entitled “On The Brink Of A Blessing”. As I’m talking about blessings and encouraging others, little did I know how much I was going to need my own words of hope in God.

I had a miscarriage. I lost a life without warning. I experienced an internal death that has shook me to my core. The actual loss was traumatic but the process of miscarriage was also a very traumatic experience. I have never experienced anything like this and I was hoping this would not be apart of my story…but it is.

With every weapon we could grab hold of, we used it to believe for a miracle. We prayed, we joined with other prayer warriors, we used scripture, we worshipped, we had Faith, we trusted, we believed, we spoke into the atmosphere God’s Word to us. And we still experienced loss.

I’m hurt. Based on my previous post on death and birth, I have been seeking God’s understanding on how this experience will help others, and what meaning is in it for me personally. I still believe life is manifested in death. I do believe all things work for my good. I do believe a miracle is still at play. There is no way God will ignore our petitions and deny His own Word. I know the miracle we believed for is going to show up differently than we expected. And…as long as God is in control of my life (and He is) there has to be some good in this.

I don’t like it. I’ll be honest. My heart still aches. Tears still fall for my lost child. One thing I have definitely learned, if God sees fit to give me life, I will accept it, be grateful for it, and never again say “I don’t want to be pregnant”. I want what God wants.

If you are reading this and have a similar experience, reach out with supportive words and kind thoughts. I’m still processing the experience and I welcome your words of comfort.

Blessings Are On the Way!

I keep getting the feeling something great is about to happen. In my years of experience just living life, whenever there is death, birth immediately comes. For example, I cannot tell you the countless times I have experienced family deaths and soon after, someone is also preparing for birth. It’s as if God designed the two to go hand in hand. Interestingly, sometimes life shows up first, as an indication you just “died” to something and entered a new season. Personally, I have been in a “dead” season in my life where my fight has seemed hopeless. Just this past weekend, I found out I am preparing for life (birth) and within a few days, it hit me. I just “died” to something! My season just shifted! God just opened doors! Hallelujah! Now, I am expecting blessings to show up one by one. I am expecting the fulfillment of prophetic words spoken years ago. I am living in expectation!

In my recent post Life Resurrected, I discussed Jesus being the overcomer of (all) death through his life that was resurrected. As I’m pondering this phenomenon, it is not just physical death that precedes birth or life, it can be death in any form. For instance, it can be death of a poor relationship, death to negative thinking, financial death, dying to oneself, death of a season in your life, etc. In all these instances of death, in some way or form, birth or life follows. This was the ultimate plan of God. There is hope. In this, no matter what may appear “dead” or “dying” in your life, a birthing (of something) is simultaneously taking place. Your dying circumstances will not overtake you, but bring new life-breathing opportunities. Keep hoping, believing, and expecting life to show up! New opportunities, new open doors, new relationships, and new life transformation moments are on the way.

As an activist, I am continuing the fight for racial equality and civil rights in my local area, I expect growth and progress. Justice, unity, and equality are not “dead” beliefs (as I once thought), but with the right approach, achievable realities. Endurance in the fight brings victory.

What appears “dead” in your life? I want to encourage you. Let’s continue the discussion.

Dr. TC

Life Resurrected: How to Live When Everything (Seemingly) is Dying All Around You

There is HOPE. I have so much hope for my future and the future of this world…right in the midst of the chaos. Why? Because I live and teach the principle that, “Things get worst before they get better.” With every great victory there is a period just before the end where it seems that victory is nowhere in sight. It may feel that all hope is lost and everything is out of control and out of balance. This is the place to rejoice because the Bible shows us over and over Triumph over Tragedy.

You may wonder, why do things have to get so bad before they get better? My belief is that in order to defeat something you have to get down on its level in order to come out on top, and literally stand on its head. For example, you wouldn’t know true happiness if you’ve never been depressed. You wouldn’t know how to truly live with hope unless you have experienced hopelessness. You wouldn’t know how to maintain a good marriage through all circumstances if you have never experienced some bad times. You wouldn’t appreciate the true blessing of good health if you have never been sick. And in recent times, we wouldn’t appreciate and yearn for unity, equality, and peace if we never experienced racism, segregation, and discord.

You see, tough times build desire, determination, and desperation for better. Desperate people are willing to be vulnerable and sacrifice EVERYTHING to experience better. The world is not dying, God is in preparation of something BIG and something BETTER. Death, even of this world, was defeated when Jesus died on the cross. The world is not ours. No manner of death can and will happen as long as Jesus LIVES! And…He is ALIVE!

Shalom, my friends. When things are seemingly dying all around you, cling to the Overcomer of all death and rest assured He is in full control. Believe in your heart that victory and triumph are near. Unite with a community of believers to find strength, comfort, and the stamina to persevere.

Dr. TC

Discover Prompt Day 22

Tempo

The state of motion or activity. At this time in life, living in quarantine, the tempo of life certainly has slowed down. I have written previously on my appreciation of the slow pace. My experience is different from others around me who are eager to get back “to normal life”. I’m more eager to figure out how to keep this same tempo when everything else starts “moving” again.

It’s interesting because I love living in fast tempo cities where there is always something to do and something to see. It excites me. I don’t get bored. I can find “something” to do even when there is “nothing” to do. Nevertheless, I am realizing how much power I have to create a new melody that complements, not competes with the tempo around me. I can create a polyphony, which is, “the style of simultaneously combining a number of parts, each forming an individual melody and harmonizing with each other.”

As the world is seemingly preparing to “reopen”, I challenge you to decide your tempo. What tempo in life is most productive? What tempo sparks the most creativity? What tempo brings your mind, body, and spirit the most peace? Although some may choose to live a more fast paced tempo, I do believe all of us need moments of “rest” to refocus and recharge, no matter the tempo we choose to live.

Dr. TC

Discover Prompt Day 21

Instrumental Moments…A Time of Reflection and Appreciation

This post is for someone somewhere! Someone needs to stop and take some time to reflect on those instrumental moments in life that have made you who you are at this very moment. Maybe you are so focused on your present you have not taken the time to reflect on where you’ve come from and where you are going. Maybe your current circumstances feel hopeless and stagnate. Maybe you are not sure what to do, how to think, how to act next because it seems as if every action leads to detrimental outcomes.

If this is you…I want you to get in a quiet, still place and just allow your mind to reflect on those instrumental moments in your life that motivated you, strengthened you, encouraged you, or maybe pushed you into your destiny. If you have any age on you, there are so many moments you can reflect on. But, when you lead this reflection time with your heart and not your head…your spirit will guide you to the exact moments God showed up BIG in your life. Your body will remember the shift in your life caused by these moments. You will know exactly which moments were instrumental on your life journey.

I will take the journey with you. I will share some of my instrumental moments as a model for your work. Here we go…

Instrumental Moment #1: Affirming Me and What I Could Be

I attended an elementary school in a rural area and experienced racism in the manner of verbal bullying at a very early age, triggered by my intelligence. I was too smart to be so black. This was the moment I could have told myself I am not good enough, not pretty enough, not smart enough to really be anything. With the confident support of a God-fearing mother and my second grade teacher who believed in my abilities and affirmed who I was daily, I know I would not be where I am today personally or professionally.

Instrumental Moment #2: Developing Self-Worth and Self-Confidence

I was a thumb sucker, which caused bucked teeth. I also have an astigmatism and needed glasses at the age of 4, maybe earlier. Well you know…back then, cute glasses for kids did not exist. So, here I was with bucked teeth and Coke bottle glasses during the prime years of social development…middle school. I had just moved to a new area where my mother and I knew absolutely no one else in the entire county. We had a raggedy station wagon with a shattered windshield as I entered the first day of middle school in my new city. At some point in 6th grade, I got braces. I don’t remember having really deep identity issues based on my appearance. However, I do absolutely remember the day I had a HUGE boost in confidence when my braces were removed after almost 3 years, and getting my first pair of contacts just as middle school ended. I do remember how it felt to walk down the hall with straight teeth and no Coke bottles glasses in my way. I actually had people that were so used to seeing me in my Coke bottle glasses, they were adversed when I started wearing contacts. Really? This is when I really begin to pay attention to my sense of self-worth and self-confidence regardless of what others thought. I liked who I was becoming and that was all that mattered.

Instrumental Moment #3: Being OK with loss

I have always experienced a lot of fear and anxiety with just the mere thought of death. Growing up in a single parent, mother-headed household, I remember constantly crying to my mother and telling her “I don’t want you to die!” Losing people you care about was the the biggest fear for me. It would cause me to to react physically and emotionally to just the thought of death. Then…I experienced loss. My most instrumental experiences of loss actually started in college. I loss a group of friends that were instrumental to me, in a way that was unexpected. I think that is what made the loss so much deeper…I couldn’t understand what exactly I did wrong and why this was happening. I have always at least tried to be a good friend and still feel confident in my relational skills, however, I definitely now understand loss has no respect of person. It took years for me to accept the fact that I loss what I thought were going to be lifetime friends, mainly because I kept begging God to replace what I loss and he didn’t…at least not in a way I could initially understand. I am now developing a greater sense of the vision God has for me that makes me OK with the loss and more open to God’s choice of friends at this stage in my life. (Just sent out thank you messages to my tribe! 💞)

Losing my grandmother and my first cousin were other more recent experiences of loss that affected me deeply. Losing these two family members really showed me how much God is in control. I have always had a close relationship with my grandmother and still have fond memories. The last couple of years, right before her death, threatened my fond memories as Dementia changed her personality and my desire to be around her. It is very difficult to interact with someone who is completely different than your previous experiences. Since her death, I have definitely had my personal moments to reflect on the good times, to cry, and pray God lets her know in heaven, just how much I appreciated her presence in my life.

The loss of my first cousin was also difficult and is still fresh. She was the oldest of the 5 first (female) cousins, who all have names beginning with the letter “T”. We call ourselves the “5 Ts”. The difficulty in this situation was finding out how deeply she was suffering physically, financially, emotionally, and spiritually…within 24 hours of the funeral. I knew her story and her journey in life were difficult, I just didn’t know the magnitude of her challenges until after her death. It’s heartbreaking to feel as if you could have helped or should have helped sooner, but didn’t! Guilt tries to creep in, but then I have to remind myself, “you can only get in where you are let in!” Dr. TC

The privacy of her life did not allow me or anyone else to have the ability to help but so much. It’s hurtful to watch someone suffer and you can’t do anything about it. Again, this was a loss that showed God’s sovereignty and full control in some of the most painful moments in life.

Ok…so I’m going to end my journey here as I could write for days. I hope my reflections of some of the instrumental moments along my journey inspires you to do the same. I am moved emotionally and spiritually in writing my own truths. Some truths are painful, yet necessary.

Take the journey! Playback your instrumental moments like beautiful elevator music as you move up and down your journey of life. It makes the ride much more pleasant.

Dr. TC

Discover Prompt Day 20

A celebration of Music…🎶

Music is in my soul. I have always loved music. I played the clarinet in middle and high school and was drum major for 2 years of high school. Our band marched in the Macy’s Thanksgiving day parade. I will never forget my first music concert with my big sis, Kid -n- Play! Boys II Men is my absolute FAVORITE boys singing group. I’m still a groupie! I cried when they split up. I teach our son with music. I believe music is healthy for brain development.

Once I became a Christian, I just simply switched genres. I primarily only listen to Christian songs, but from many different genres. I also enjoy jazz, oldies, and a little soulful music as well. Music speaks to me. Music comforts me. Music gives me words when I have no words. Music moves my soul. I dedicate this post to music. I don’t have a lot of words to express my sentiment for music. I simply want to share this next song, along with the lyrics, with you. This song has always been my favorite tribute to music and describes EXACTLY how music has served me and continues to bring balance and a solid foundation to my life. I hear music everywhere all the time. No matter what I’m going through. I can find a song that speaks to my heart. Oblige me…listen to this song and help me celebrate, music.

~ Always In My Head ~

You’re like a cool breeze, on a summer’s day

You are a river running through the desert plain

You are my shelter, from the pouring rain

You were my comfort, even before the pain

I can hear the sound of five drummers in the wind

The leaves blowing in the breeze, ring out like guitars

A tin can rolls across the gravel like a tambourine

I am but a vessel, so I sing, because you are

In my head, you’re always in my head

In my dreams, you’re always in my head

In my pain, you’re always in my head

In my peace, you’re always in my head

A rainbow of rhythm stretches across the sky

An airplane in the distance, plays a beautiful cello line

It’s no coincidence; it’s in tune with the music in my head

If you were a shoulder you’re where I would rest, but I am your vessel so I hear, you

In my head, you’re always in my head

In my fears, you’re always in my head

In my joy, you’re always in my head

In my tears, you’re always in my head

You’re like a cool breeze, on a summer’s day

You are a river, running through a desert plain

You’ve been my shelter, from the pouring rain

You were my comfort, even before the pain: ’cause I hear you

In my head, you’re always in my head

In my dreams, you’re always in my head

In my pain, you’re always in my head

In my peace, you’re always in my head

In my head, you’re always in my head

In my fears, you’re always in my head

In my joy, you’re always in my head

In my tears, you’re always in my head

Thank you God for creating music…

Dr. TC

Discover Prompt Day 19

Do you Know The Rule of Three?

I struggled with this post initially. Why? Because my favorite number is 4. Ha! This is honestly the first thing I thought of when trying to think about what to write about (3). I like nice even, manageable numbers. The number (3) is odd, literally! What do you do with the leftover?

Then I took a small personal journey in (3) steps to increase my understanding:

  1. Remembering
  2. Exploring
  3. Transforming

Step 1-REMEMBERING: I first allowed my mind to remember the first thoughts that came to mind that had anything to do with the number (3). The Three Little Pigs. Goldilocks and the Three Bears. The Three Billy Goats Gruff. (I have a 3 year old! Ha!) The Holy Trinity.

Step 2-EXPLORING: Step 1 was intriguing enough, I started to do some internet research on The Rule of Three. Here are some important statements/quotes I found that caused a visceral and even spiritual reaction in me as I kept exploring.

Three is the…

  • smallest amount of information needed to create a pattern.
  • “The rule of three or power of three is a writing principle that suggests that things that come in threes are funnier, more satisfying, or more effective than other numbers of things. The reader or audience of this form of text is also thereby more likely to remember the information.
  • Threes really resonate with the human brain.

The more I researched, the greater my interest to learn more. On a spiritual level, I felt The Rule of Three was much more significant in my life than what I had ever realized. Another intriguing use of the Rule of Thirds was in photography. I learned dividing images into thirds create a more interesting composition. Definitely will try this one!

After exploring, I realized that I was using the Rule of Three without even realizing it. For instance, in my new Total Wellness by Dr. TC program I focus on the Mind, Body, & Spirit. I aim to help others identify the barriers in their mental & spiritual health in order to improve their physical health. In the first week of the program, I have all participants identify (3) goals they will work on throughout the program. Aha!

Step 3-TRANSFORMING: What did I learn that will forever change me? There is something to the number (3). I had prior knowledge of the intentional use of numbers in the Bible, such as 7 (completion) & 8 (governmental order), yet never took a more in depth look at the number (3). My mind and spirit have been transformed with this new knowledge and the psychological impact of the The Rule of Three. In all things mysterious, in all things marvelous, in all things magnificent, I know the power of God (The Father, The Son, The Holy Spirit) is at work. The most significant, life changing statement I discovered is this: The power of numbers point back that God exists.

Amen, amen, amen…

Dr. TC

Discover Prompt Day 17

The Distance Between A Promise and Manifestation

Have you ever been so close to something, yet so far away. This has been the conundrum of my life for the past several years. I have been living in the space between a promise and manifestation. To be honest, I do not know how to live in this space. I do not know how to think, how to act, how to feel…I’m still figuring things out.

Distance. The space between a promise and manifestation is the constant waxing and waning of distance. There are moments when I feel very close to the “end”, then there are moments I feel at the very beginning. Sometimes it seems the waxing and waning is in response to my own reactions to my circumstances; some days I’m hopeful, other days I feel hopeless. Sometimes it seems the waxing and waning has nothing to do with me, but just the ebb and flow of life.

Distance. There are moments I feel so close to God, I can almost feel his breath. Then there are moments I feel I have to beg and plead for God to hear me. The closeness to God is so comforting and creates a sense of security. The days I feel distant from God I feel shunned for something I don’t understand. I feel like a lost sheep…a forgotten soldier.

Distance. What is this place? Why does it exist? In light of social distancing, distance is necessary to reduce and eliminate. In the light of a relationship where two partners are miles apart, distance produces fondness, admiration, and a yearning to connect. In light of a freeway with heavy traffic, maintaining distance means safety, precaution, and wisdom. In the light of an unhealthy relationship, distance is necessary for separation, freedom, and restoration. In the Bible, Jesus even felt distant from God as he was near death on the cross. Matthew 27: 46 (NIV) states, “About three in the afternoon Jesus cried out in a loud voice, “Eli, Eli, lema sabachthani?” (which means My God, my God, why have you forsaken me?” In the next moment, he died and the world was forever changed.

Distance. So…what if the distance between my promise and manifestation is necessary for an unexpected, life-changing outcome? What if the distance between my promise and manifestation is drawing me closer to God through a growing fondness and admiration? What if the “driver” of my life is using distance as safety and precaution to not allow me to be so much in control of a life I didn’t create? What if distance is allowing me moments to restore my total dependence on God and restoring His place as the head of my life?

Distance. I am still struggling, but one thing I am realizing through this time of reflection, Jesus’ painful acknowledgment of distance from God on the cross, just before manifestation of the promise, must mean I am somehow on the right track.

Be encouraged in your distance.

Dr. TC

How To Love When You Dont Like

 

true love

“For God so loved the world that He gave his only begotten son…” John 3:16

So…God LOVED the world but do you believe God LIKED the world?

I hope most of us, if not all of us, agree that God probably didn’t like the world at the time He sent Jesus. How could He? The world was filled with murderous people, incest, debauchery, idol worshippers, complainers, naggers, criticizers, stubbornness, gluttony, greed, sexual immorality, jealousy, schemers, manipulators, etc. And most of this you can read about in Genesis, just the first book of the Bible!

But here is the kicker…despite it all, He chose to give these same people His best. You see, Jesus Christ was His ONLY begotten son. The best part of Him. There is and will be no other like Him.

God was able to look past what He didn’t like in us and still give us the best part of His love for us…Jesus Christ. Who does that?…Who chooses to gift those they do not like with their best? You see when God gifted us with His best, despite what He didn’t like, a double miracle took place. Jesus Christ became all man and all God born of a virgin AND we became eligible for redemption.

So…what should you do to love someone you don’t like? Give them the best part of you. A friend hurt your feelings or has been disloyal? Give them your best listening ear and heart when they are in need. Spouse broken your trust or unsupportive? Give them your best “I love you” and a hug of forgiveness. Boss treating you unfairly? Give them your best work and smile throughout your day. Child acting up? Give them your best compliment affirming who they are in Christ.

Now, learning to love when you don’t like is not easy but it always results in a double miracle. You and the other person get blessed. I am a witness. I strive to live my life by the phrase “Kill’em with Kindness”. I have found that when I have to interact with an enemy, when I “Kill’em with Kindness” I paralyze them with so much love they soon forget why they didn’t like me. It is the same concept with the gift of Jesus. Love always prevails.

Here is the takeaway, when you don’t like someone, choose to give them a gift of love…the best part of you…and watch double miracles take place.

Live Out Loud,

Dr. TC