The Passionate Parent

I’m passionate about a few things in life and parenting is one of them. As I observe myself in my role as “mommy” I realize my connection to my role runs deep. I do believe I didn’t just happen to get pregnant, but was assigned the role by God. What God entrusts me with, I take very seriously…wife, mom, ministry leader, etc. In the roles I’ve been assigned I go all in! I give and give and give. I serve and serve and serve. I prioritize and prioritize and prioritize.

As a passionate parent, I believe children are not objects but subjects. They have thoughts, feelings, and opinions. I understand that appropriate guidance helps children understand and properly express their thoughts, feelings, and opinions, but they should never be dismissed…no matter the age of the child. I respect what my two year old thinks and feels and I hope to provide the same respect when he’s twelve.

As a passionate parent, I believe children have a connection with God that is more pure than adults. Why? Because their connection is not yet fully controlled by man. This is why I believe children are more resilient and can forgive more easily than adults; because of their innocent, pure connection to God, even if they don’t fully know who He is. It saddens me to experience children who have been tainted by man very early in life. I’ve experienced one recently whom I strongly believe had been taught it’s ok to disrespect others who don’t have what they have…white skin. My young black son just happened to be the victim of this experience and he’s only two!

As a passionate parent, I believe in holding, touching and showing affection to my child. Human touch is essential for development. Children who lack human touch become savages. They suffer in their emotional and physical development. I can’t understand why some people get offended when they observe someone else holding their own baby. I’ve heard such phrases as “she’s holding that baby too much” “she needs to put that baby down” “that baby is going to be spoiled rotten”. I believe babies are not capable of being spoiled. Do they get used to human touch and being held and expect it? Yes! Does this mean they are spoiled? No! Even as an adult, when I think about God as my father, I expect God to always be there. I expect Him to hold me when I need comforting or feel lonely. And He does just that for all of us from the time we are born to when we die. So why do some of us offer less than what God gives us to our own babies? Why do we withhold good things from our children for fear of “spoiling them”. Fear is not of God. As a passionate parent, I make physical contact with my child as often as I can and I allow him to make connection with me as often as he needs it. Because children have not yet developed the language as adults, when my child says “I want to hold you.” (Translation: He wants me to hold him), I oblige because I may not know just how healing and comforting my touch is to my child in that moment. I simply trust the process and the power of human touch.

As a passionate parent, I constantly put my child’s needs before my own even if it hurts me. Isn’t that what Jesus did on the cross? I am willing to sacrifice my needs and desires to first help my child accomplish his needs and desires. As a passionate parent, I intentionally seek opportunities that give my son the most creative and diverse experiences in life. This is why I am planning to homeschool. I want to be guided by the Holy Spirit on how to shape his mind. I get to decide the curriculum. I get to decide the pacing. I get to decide the learning experiences. This is not because I desire to be in control, but I believe homeschooling would better ensure God’s in control. As a passionate parent, I don’t want my child’s learning to be limited by curriculum or grade level.

I’m a passionate parent who takes my role as parent very seriously. I admire other parents who have gone before me and I hope to inspire parents-to-be to parent without fear but with confidence…to parent with unconditional love…to parent with grace…to be a forgiving parent for themselves and their child(ren)…to parent from their own strengths…to parent keeping God first…to parent from a position of influence not power.

Happy parenting! Dr. TC