How To Love When You Dont Like


true love

“For God so loved the world that He gave his only begotten son…” John 3:16

So…God LOVED the world but do you believe God LIKED the world?

I hope most of us, if not all of us, agree that God probably didn’t like the world at the time He sent Jesus. How could He? The world was filled with murderous people, incest, debauchery, idol worshippers, complainers, naggers, criticizers, stubbornness, gluttony, greed, sexual immorality, jealousy, schemers, manipulators, etc. And most of this you can read about in Genesis, just the first book of the Bible!

But here is the kicker…despite it all, He chose to give these same people His best. You see, Jesus Christ was His ONLY begotten son. The best part of Him. There is and will be no other like Him.

God was able to look past what He didn’t like in us and still give us the best part of His love for us…Jesus Christ. Who does that?…Who chooses to gift those they do not like with their best? You see when God gifted us with His best, despite what He didn’t like, a double miracle took place. Jesus Christ became all man and all God born of a virgin AND we became eligible for redemption.

So…what should you do to love someone you don’t like? Give them the best part of you. A friend hurt your feelings or has been disloyal? Give them your best listening ear and heart when they are in need. Spouse broken your trust or unsupportive? Give them your best “I love you” and a hug of forgiveness. Boss treating you unfairly? Give them your best work and smile throughout your day. Child acting up? Give them your best compliment affirming who they are in Christ.

Now, learning to love when you don’t like is not easy but it always results in a double miracle. You and the other person get blessed. I am a witness. I strive to live my life by the phrase “Kill’em with Kindness”. I have found that when I have to interact with an enemy, when I “Kill’em with Kindness” I paralyze them with so much love they soon forget why they didn’t like me. It is the same concept with the gift of Jesus. Love always prevails.

Here is the takeaway, when you don’t like someone, choose to give them a gift of love…the best part of you…and watch double miracles take place.

Live Out Loud,

Dr. TC

Cracks and Crevices



clean heartSo I was cleaning my house the other day, tidying up the living room. I vacuumed, dusted, straightened the pillows, etc. As I ran the vacuum over the area rug, I noticed some crumbs underneath the couch, unable to be reached by the vacuum. Now, I am the type that once I see it I can not let it go. So, I moved the couch and lo and behold more crumbs appear. I took out the special tools of the vacuum that allow you to get underneath furniture and vacuum the cracks and crevices of the couch not seen with the eye, and unable to be reached with the regular vacuum. Then…God spoke to me. He posed a question and said…”What if people really allowed me to get into the cracks and crevices of their lives, the hidden places of their hearts?”
You see, just like cleaning, many of us make the surface of our lives look good. From the outside we have it all together. We have a well polished life, not realizing the dirty stuff is hiding in the cracks and crevices. You see, in the cracks and crevices is where you find such things as doubt, fear, low self-esteem, anger, unhealed wounds, pessimism, etc. These things cause us to hold on to the past, miss the present, and block the future. It is the junk that rests in the cracks and crevices that prevent us from having a truly fulfilling life. Let’s face it, God already knows the real you, all the stuff in the cracks and crevices. He is waiting on you to discover the real you. A friend of mine once said something that has really stuck with me, “the biggest lie you can tell is the one you tell yourself”. Once you see the crumbs in your heart, don’t ignore them. Grab the right tool to clean them up. And that tool is God.

Having a clean heart is refreshing. Just like the pleasure experienced when you inhale in a freshly, cleansed home. Be aware that deep cleaning is a process. You might have to start room by room examining every surface to make sure you don’t miss anything. This may require  exploring your life from childhood on up looking for unhealed wounds, areas of unforgiveness, attachment injuries, broken relationships, negative self-talk, abuse, neglect, etc. Ask yourself, “Where have I been injured and never attended to the wound?” No injury is too great or too small, they all leave a trail of dirt.

I challenge you to examine the cracks and crevices of your heart and allow God to do a deep cleaning. When your heart is in its purest and cleanest state then can you truly experience what it is like to live out loud!

Live out Loud,

Dr. TC